Asphyxiation

I tend to avoid you

all the while following carefully in your wake.

To be near you is intoxicating,

to get too close will surely end in my demise.

I pretend to not notice you yet I

am cautiously observant of the way you light up a room.

When my eyes meet yours,

the intensity of your gaze threatens to shatter my persona.

I try to ignore you, hoping

that you'll seek me out and begin a conversation.

I'm afraid, however that your voice

has a tendency to make my head dizzy and faint.

You don't even see me, do you?

I'm nothing to you-- I never will be, will I?

Yet you're everything to me, and my heart is

in the throes of palpitations when your presence is my vicinity.

You've caused my disease yet

you're also the antidote to mend my aching heart.

But perhaps I'm meant to be tormented, perhaps

your love was never meant for me.

These unspoken words will surely choke me: hold

my throat, unrelenting, until my colour turns to blue.

I don't know whether I should fight against or give in,

either way, the choice depletes my vitality.

My lungs are tight within their calcified prison,

no oxygen can be detected rushing in.

I hold my breath whenever I see you,

and I forget to exhale.